Just Let Me Cry

Just Let Me Cry

By: Hilary Weeks

I believe that everything happens for a reason

We’re not just tossed by the wind and left in the hands of fate

But sometimes life sends a storm that’s unexpected

And we’re forced to face our deepest pain.

And when I feel the heartache begin to pull me under

I dig my heels in deep and I fight to keep my ground

Still at times the hurt inside grows stronger

And there’s nothing I can do but let it out

So just let me cry

I know it’s hard to see

But the pain I feel isn’t going away today

So just let me cry

‘Til every tear has fallen

Don’t ask when and don’t ask why

Just let me cry

When I agreed that God could put this heart inside me

I understood that there would be a chance that it would break

But I know he knows exactly how I’m feeling

And I know in time he’ll take the pain away

But for now just let me cry

I know it’s hard to see

But the pain I feel isn’t going away today

So just let me cry

‘Til every tear has fallen

Don’t ask when and don’t ask why

Just let me cry

I have felt joy, the kind that makes my heart want to sing

And so my tears are not a surrender, I’ll feel that way again

But for now, for this moment

Just let me cry

I know it’s hard to see

But the pain I feel isn’t going away today

Just let me cry

Until every tear has fallen

Don’t ask when and don’t ask why

Just let me cry

I believe that everything happens for a reason

I have the biggest problem of just letting things go... I don't understand what's wrong with me. I'm a lost cause, I know. It'd be nice to know what my life is going to be like 10 years from now.. But for now just let me cry. 

I like to sing.

Get at me. Yesterday when I was home alone for probably 3 or so hours & I figured out ways to entertain myself by taking pictures, doing nothing productive on the internet, and recording myself singing. This is a product of that. So if you don't think it's too good that's fine... since after all, I just did this to fill my boredom. 

Cuddle Season.

Yep that's right. It's that time of the year where people start pairing off for the winter. I like the call it the cuddle season because usually those pairings last until the snow starts to melt.

Girls saying things like "I need someone to cuddle with during these cold winter nights"
I'm guilty of saying it. After all cuddling is my fav.

I don't need a boyfriend. But I like having one when I do (minus the stress when it doesn't look like it's going to work)
It's just nice to have that one guy you get all excited to see all the time.
I get all flattered when people declare us as 'such a cute couple' since I never had something like that in high school.
I enjoy late night cuddle chats with the one person I want to get to know better most of all.
Adventures are always great.
I like being felt like I matter more than anything to that person; especially when I feel the exact same way.
I like checking my phone and knowing that my cute man left a cute message.
I don't know.. I guess in general I like to feel like I'm really special to someone I find really special. 

I would like to feel like someone would be more scared to loose me more than anything.

That's a big one.

Because I'm kind of tired of getting in relationships with guys that would just let me go so easily.

Eventually, I will have a man for these many cold winter nights that will ALWAYS be there. Not just for a season. But until mister right comes along... Holla at cho girl that conveniently has a snuggie during this cuddle season until the right man comes. 

Until the next post :)

Really Now.. Really?

It sometimes even amazes me how my life plays out... almost annoying how some things don't ever work out.

My Portfolio Site!

Hello to my 15 or so readers (hint: If you're reading this... you should follow me!!) 
This past winter break I met professional photographer who's been helping me out with setting myself up as a photographer! 

Here's my new portfolio site that you all should check out (Yep, that's the link)
It's still a work in progress though. But that's probably where I'll be putting up future photos instead of on this blog. (Unless I decide otherwise). 

Holla at cho girl :) 

2012 Review

2012, to say the least, was not one of my best years. 

I know.. most of the time when you see blog posts reviewing their year they start gushing on and on about what was really great about the year and what they've learned. I can definitely tell you there were some great moments & I also can say that I learned A LOT. 

A lot of happiness, along with heartbreak. A lot of excitement, along with learning experiences. A lot of moments trying to figure things out about myself... and what I want.

I'm very hopeful that 2013 will bring a lot more happiness. As of where I stand right now, I feel myself getting closer to that place each and every day :) 

I'm proud of myself, yet scared of the decisions I make sometimes. 
I've learned that you need to live with and believe in the decisions you make for yourself to be better off. 
I keep reminding myself that I need to put all my trust and faith into God's timing, because I know he wants nothing but the best for me.

Maybe I won't be working for Disney or doing humanitarian work just yet, because God knows something greater is in store for me. Maybe the people who walk in and out of my life so quickly were only there to teach me a short lesson. Maybe the path I'm choosing school wise is the right place to go, and maybe not? 
Maybe this... maybe that. All I KNOW for certain is that I need to put all my faith in the Lord's plan for ME. As long as I do that, I know everything will be fine. 

That is one of the MAIN things I learned in this past year... and believe me sometimes it's hard. But, I have great people around me that help me get through it. 

I'm starting to do things that will help me GROW. 
I'm beginning to show people my love for singing for the first time in 20 years.
I'm letting people know how much I love photography and want to do that as a career choice. 
I'm going to go to places that help me reach that goal
I'm eager to go to the temple more often
I'm trying to be more proactive by going to the gym more than I did (once a week is a very good start for ME)
I'm cooking meals (which is Pinterest's fault... but it's been great regardless)
I'm hanging out with people that also help me grow more (especially spiritual growth)... That's what I need more than anything. 
& more. 

The second half of this year, I had completely lost myself. I had never been so out of it in my life. I had changed a little in a negative way, which was not good. But, now I'm thinking a little more positive each and every day. Thanks to the people who have stayed in my life and helped me get through this change & back to normal. I know they'll be there for me in 2013 and many other years to come :) 

I won't allow myself to get so down like in the past year ever again. 
So all I have to say now is.... DEUCES 2012. You are now my past.
2013... I welcome you with open arms and high hopes :)

In the Mood..

To sing some Les Miserables! 

I've been listening to the music since I saw the movie a few days ago... Let's just say, I can't really stop. 
So here's me singing 'On My Own'

Kinda messed up some of the lyrics since I just learned it, so bare with me...