April's Positivity Blog

I've decided to start this new thing. I call it positive blog. 
Each month I am going to do a blog post on positive things that are going on in my life. 

I've realized that I have been the most negative Nancy for the past year and it's time for that to stop. I now have realized the reasoning behind the constant back to back negative outcomes for the past year & I'm finally saying STOP. 
My mom has been telling me about this documentary movie on Netflix called 'The Secret'. She would tell me to watch it every single time I would complain about how wrong my life seemed to be going. Today all she told me was "Alright, I'm going to hang up the phone now so you can watch that documentary..." and my response would be like "No wait... I have more to vent about......". She then said "Go watch it." So I was like ugh fine.. because it didn't seem like she was going to continue the conversation any further. 

I started watching this movie. I was a little skeptical at first because it seemed pretty cheesy and I was not positive if the people that were giving me a pep talk were real people who have done this, or actors. I looked up a lot of their names online while I watched and it was not fake. These people were real time/big time authors, doctors, psychologists etc. 
The movie went on to tell you about the 'secret' to how to be happy, successful, have good health, have good relationships with others, etc. The secret basically is 'The Law of Attraction'. If you send out thoughts into the universe of what you want it will inevitably happen. Done. You cannot doubt either because that only brings out negative thoughts, which brings out negative outcomes. They went on to explain that no matter what you think comes to be. For example, if you think of how much debt you're in, guess what is going to happen? More debt. The universe does not see that you 'don't' want debt. All it keeps hearing is you complaining about debt. So that's what it is giving you, because the more you put it out there, the more likely it is to happen. So say you don't want debt? Instead of saying how much you wish you weren't in debt and how you hate debt, think about getting more paychecks in the mail. You'll notice that the outcome will be more paychecks! 

Now I bet most of you think this is dumb. Trust me I did.. even when my mom explained that to me I was like 'Okay, whatever lady'. But, I'm starting to see why my life has been not so great lately! 
Anytime I would apply to get accepted into anything I tried to force my thoughts to not get it's hopes up just so I would not get hurt if I did not get accepted. Here's the thing. Saying that and putting those vibes in the universe pretty much got me there. Not accepted. & you know what? My feelings were still hurt even if my hopes weren't up. So why not just have my hopes up next time and put more positive vibes out there? I will get accepted. I will become what I want to become. 

I'm starting to see SO MUCH of my life in a different view. Positive people want to be around positive people. No one wants to be around a girl that mops and whines all the time. That's why I need to be more positive. 

So let's just say this. Use me as your guinea pig! If my life stays the same.. and nothing positive happens, then you don't have to try it for yourself. But if it does..... I'll be your new go-to real-life example : )

My Positive Thoughts:  
- I will become whatever I want to become. I want to become a professional photographer.. & and a dang good one at that!
- I will marry someone who fits all the qualities on the list I wrote down that I keep under my pillow
- Next school year will be fantastic
- The people I will meet in these upcoming months will change my life for the better

1 Thing I'm Grateful For:
My bed

I will put something that I'm grateful for after every blogpost from now on. 

& When it comes to the positive thoughts. I definitely need to work on it! After all I've been a poop for the past year... but it's never to late to start being the person I want to become.  

Until the next post :) 

Guess I'm Bored

So this is what I'll do. 

Cool. 

Just Let Me Cry

Just Let Me Cry

By: Hilary Weeks

I believe that everything happens for a reason

We’re not just tossed by the wind and left in the hands of fate

But sometimes life sends a storm that’s unexpected

And we’re forced to face our deepest pain.

And when I feel the heartache begin to pull me under

I dig my heels in deep and I fight to keep my ground

Still at times the hurt inside grows stronger

And there’s nothing I can do but let it out

So just let me cry

I know it’s hard to see

But the pain I feel isn’t going away today

So just let me cry

‘Til every tear has fallen

Don’t ask when and don’t ask why

Just let me cry

When I agreed that God could put this heart inside me

I understood that there would be a chance that it would break

But I know he knows exactly how I’m feeling

And I know in time he’ll take the pain away

But for now just let me cry

I know it’s hard to see

But the pain I feel isn’t going away today

So just let me cry

‘Til every tear has fallen

Don’t ask when and don’t ask why

Just let me cry

I have felt joy, the kind that makes my heart want to sing

And so my tears are not a surrender, I’ll feel that way again

But for now, for this moment

Just let me cry

I know it’s hard to see

But the pain I feel isn’t going away today

Just let me cry

Until every tear has fallen

Don’t ask when and don’t ask why

Just let me cry

I believe that everything happens for a reason

I have the biggest problem of just letting things go... I don't understand what's wrong with me. I'm a lost cause, I know. It'd be nice to know what my life is going to be like 10 years from now.. But for now just let me cry. 

I like to sing.

Get at me. Yesterday when I was home alone for probably 3 or so hours & I figured out ways to entertain myself by taking pictures, doing nothing productive on the internet, and recording myself singing. This is a product of that. So if you don't think it's too good that's fine... since after all, I just did this to fill my boredom. 

Cuddle Season.

Yep that's right. It's that time of the year where people start pairing off for the winter. I like the call it the cuddle season because usually those pairings last until the snow starts to melt.

Girls saying things like "I need someone to cuddle with during these cold winter nights"
I'm guilty of saying it. After all cuddling is my fav.

I don't need a boyfriend. But I like having one when I do (minus the stress when it doesn't look like it's going to work)
It's just nice to have that one guy you get all excited to see all the time.
I get all flattered when people declare us as 'such a cute couple' since I never had something like that in high school.
I enjoy late night cuddle chats with the one person I want to get to know better most of all.
Adventures are always great.
I like being felt like I matter more than anything to that person; especially when I feel the exact same way.
I like checking my phone and knowing that my cute man left a cute message.
I don't know.. I guess in general I like to feel like I'm really special to someone I find really special. 

I would like to feel like someone would be more scared to loose me more than anything.

That's a big one.

Because I'm kind of tired of getting in relationships with guys that would just let me go so easily.

Eventually, I will have a man for these many cold winter nights that will ALWAYS be there. Not just for a season. But until mister right comes along... Holla at cho girl that conveniently has a snuggie during this cuddle season until the right man comes. 

Until the next post :)

Really Now.. Really?

It sometimes even amazes me how my life plays out... almost annoying how some things don't ever work out.

My Portfolio Site!

Hello to my 15 or so readers (hint: If you're reading this... you should follow me!!) 
This past winter break I met professional photographer who's been helping me out with setting myself up as a photographer! 

Here's my new portfolio site that you all should check out (Yep, that's the link)
It's still a work in progress though. But that's probably where I'll be putting up future photos instead of on this blog. (Unless I decide otherwise). 

Holla at cho girl :)